desperate

It is going to fail.

It hurts in some ways to be such a dissapointment to you.
So I don't feel like a person anymore.
The world is insane and I'm trying to escape that hard.
But pain is what it is.
Daunting.
Inevitable.
It mortally shots me.
And it makes me feel so worthless and it's gonna show me that I never ever deserve you.